11:37 a.m. - Nov 5, 2001
Finding my way
Finding my way.
This weekend was very productive. I spent the better part of Saturday & Sunday unpacking boxes and cleaning. Woo hoo. Big plans, let me tell you.
But, I'm so glad that my place is coming together - and I look forward to entertaining again.
I did have a date Friday night. With a girl. Aimee. We met online and have been chatting for several weeks, off and on. I gave her my home number and she called me Friday, early evening. My son had roller-skated over to my place and we were hanging out when Aimee called. We agreed to meet at Cafe Adobe at 8:30PM. I had plenty of time to visit with my son and freshen up, before meeting her.
Aimee is a realy nice girl, really down-to-earth. She also likes to camp and hike and travel, just like me. She is a lesbian and understands that I am bi-sexual. We ate dinner on the patio at Brasil and then headed over to JRs. We sat out on the patio at JRs for hours, just talking and enjoying the beautiul weather. At 12:30AM, she asked, "Is this good for you, or would you like to go somewhere else?" I told her that I was just enjoying being outside, under the stars. She said, "Yeah. Well, we could always go to Galveston." And she smiled. I had told her about my spontaneous moments of fun & adventure. I asked her if she was serious and she replied she was. I hugged her in my excitement. We hopped in her car, rolled down the windows, cranked up the tunes, and drove to East Beach. It was a tiny bit chilly and a tiny bit windy. We took a walk. We laid out a blanket and sat, staring up at the night sky for a long while...in silence. It was a gorgeous night and I love the beach so much. She told me all about the stars, the constellations, and all the stories that make up their names. It was fascinating. We hugged for a long time and then we kissed. I had a really good time with her. BUT... (and there is a BUT here)...BUT, I just kept thinking about Leigh. The entire evening. I wondered what he was doing. I wondered if he was thinking about me. I wondered if he was seeing other people. I thought to myself, "I don't want to think about him seeing other people." I thought about what he might think, if he knew I was out with someone else. I felt like I was betraying my heart. I felt like running away from Aimee. I felt like running right back into Leigh's arms. But, soon enough. We are going to be together this coming weekend, for three whole glorious days.
I am trying very hard to remain casual and to just take things one day at a time. I am trying not to analyze my situation too much and just enjoy myself.
But, all I can think about...
