10:43 a.m. - Nov 9, 2001
It's in the cards
So, I read my cards last night. Actually, I did two readings, from two different decks. My oldest deck is one that Brother Owl gave me over 10 years ago (jeez, it really has been that long!) It was a powerful & personal gift because it was the deck he used to always read from. It's the Witches Deck. A very beautiful deck. This is a good deck to read from when you are looking for an indepth look at something from many different angles and on different levels. It gives you a really good snapshot of everything. My cards told me that the time is not right. That there is a gift of great knowledge and insight in my future. But, to obtain these gifts, I first must take care of myself. It's important not to gove so much of yourself that you have nothing left for yourself. They told me to walk away and let go.
Of course, I already knew this. But, it was really terrific to just see that the Universe was speaking this truth to me. My spread was very specific and focused.
The 2nd reading I did was from my newest deck, The Medicine Cards. I bought these in Austin two years ago. They are sweet and beautiful and carry the words & teachings from ancient animal guides. These were obtained as a gift to myself, to rekindle and reconnect with the part of soul that is Native American. The Medicine Cards are a good deck to read from when you are looking for guidance on what you need to work on to continue to grow and develop on your true path. These cards are usually quite benign but last night they spoke of depleted energies and the need to seek out silence to find my inner voice. I drew some very powerful animals and was quite pleased that I was blessed with such strong guides. I was asked to reconnect with nature - to spend some time alone and to gather my energy around me. To save for a rainy day. I was asked to give thanks for all of the blessings that I have been given and to seek out their sometimes hidden or disguised teachings.
So, I sat down last night and I wrote an "I am grateful for" list. I filled an entire page, with tiny words and phrases crammed into all of the corners. I only had the one piece of paper. When I couldn't fit a single word more on the page, I stopped. I re-read my list. It was truly beautiful. I am so lucky and so blessed.
I came to learn yet another life lesson - this one was meant for me, specifically. Sensitivity is a gift. Yes, it can also be a curse, but truly it is a great gift. Not everyone can hear what is unspoken, or see things which are hidden. I gladly accept this gift and have made a conscios decision to focus my energy on harvesting and growing this gift further. My cards told me that I am to use this gift to teach people their own truths.
After reading my list, I drifted off to a peaceful night's sleep. When I awoke this morning, a tiny & mischievous voice whispered to me, "Fuck him." And I giggled. I woke up with a smile on my face and a happiness in my heart.
Endings are just beginnings.
This, too, is a blessing.
