3:43 p.m. - Sept. 06, 2003
Friday Night Fever
Last night I was on a mission. Undercover.
I had a spontaneous adventure out, alone. I haven't really done this in years. When I was 21, 22, 23, I would often go out at night, alone.
Is this stupid? Does it sound unsafe?
Oh god ~ I must be getting old if I am questioning whether or not to do something based on the fact that it is safe or not...
I was driving home, after dinner at Tami's, for Matt's birthday. I was listening to Natacha Atlas, Something Dangerous. I cannot stop playing this. I love it, love it, love it!!! Natacha's voice is sultry, sexy and somehow also spiritual and fluid. At times, it is funky and groovy...and then it changes to beautiful, spiritual Middle Eastern influenced melodies.
Makes me want to belly dance. Ah, my own bastardized version, of course.
Anyway...I'm getting off track. Last night, while driving home, I was grooving on this CD, with the windows open and the music up loud, smoking and driving. The weather last night was absolutely gorgeous!!! Not too hot, not too humid...just warm and clear and lovely. I found myself driving...and, instead of going home, I decided to go to this funky little place I'd been once or twice before.
I put my hair up in pig tails and went out. I had a couple of drinks and saw a few people I knew. But, after a short period of time, I was terribly bored with the place. Dare I say - the people, too. Not my scene. Just a bit young. There seemed to be no one to talk with.
I headed out of there and over to another place - one of my old stomping grounds. As soon as I walked in the door, I could see that there was absolutely nothing go on there. I turned on my heels and started to walk to the door. But, as I reached the door, I heard someone say, "Hey, don't leave." Surely no one was talking to me.
It was the young barback Ray. He was funny as shit...until he started to hit on me. He sketched my face, on a notepad and gave this drawing to me, after signing it. He asked if I wanted to go to an after-hours club with him, to go dancing. I told him no, it wasn't my scene. Then he asked me to go to an early breakfast. Again, I told him, "No, I dont do early breakfast." I appreciate the offer, but no thank you. Nice meeting you. He just annoyed the shit out of me from that point forward.
Oh. And I smoked a cigarette last night. Fuck, my first one since April 15th of this year. Four months. Just the one cigarette. I bummed it off of a guy that I used to know at this bar, many many years back. He didn't remember me. I sat and talked with him, looked him in the eyes, introduced myself when he asked my name. Nada. Nothing. No recognition. Wow, this actually happens a lot to me, in my life. I tend to remember people - if not their names, at least where I met or saw them. Freaky. And I go undetected, throughout life.
It's sometimes cool to be invisible.
After I could take no more bullshit (and when my Khalua and coffee was gone), I left.
"Going home, I'm tired."
I drove around the corner and found myself parking my car...headed into a gay dance club. This is also I place I used to go ~ but that was when it had different owners. I paid more to park ($5) than to get into this club ($3). It was 1AM.
Fuck it, I wanted to dance.
Didn't need any more alcohol, I drank water and boogie'd. The entire hour that I had to dance, I did just that - and only that. At one point, I was surrounded by three fem lesbians (from what I could gather), all smiling and grinding. One accidentally bumped into me and made one of my pig tails lopsided. I kid you not.
And I danced with gay boys that seemed to love to dance as much as I did. And I flirted with a tiny, sweet bottom boy (Asian cutie), knowing that it was only all in fun. Great time.
Until that freaky dude (big guy, gay, Latin, drunk...maybe on other drugs) would not leave me alone. I could not understand anything that he said to me. Except he did keep telling me how cute I was, because I "just look like a little girl, you're so cute."
Eek.
After they called last call, he saw a cute little Asian girl, standing very quietly next to the dance floor. He then kept telling me how cute she is. Then he walked over to her, half stumbling. Silly, gross, sad.
As soon as he started to walk towards her, I made my break. I didn't hesitate at all. I'm a fucking pro at disappearing. I really am. No purse to pick up, no one else to find, I just turned on my heels and left.
I got in my car, tired and happy. I love to dance. Good DJs. Good music. Fun. But sad.
I couldn't help but feel how desperate everyone seemed.
Ok so now it is Saturday. My fucking cat mews incessantly, beginning at 7am, that bitch. Ok, I know ~ I am overreacting...being mean, by calling her names and by being pissed at her because she is sick of being trapped inside my home. She wants to go outside. Can't go outside. I do not want her to have a third freakin litter of kittens. No more. I need to get her "altererd." She has birthed no less than nine kittens to date. That is more than enough kittens. I have only two more to adopt out. Not bad.
Ramble, ramble, ramble.
It's a lazy afternoon. Finally sunny again, after endless days of rain. Went to Nico's football game. We kicked their asses. It was a Jr. Varsity game, but Nico was asked to suit up. Coach played him three times, much to Poppy and my surprise. He did well.
I'm over at the castle. Boys are out of town til tomorrow. I just fed Chazz. In a few hours I am headed over to a Luaua party. Should be fun.
Ah...reminds me ~ I need to go find some raffia, to replace the piece that broke on the coconuts that I am going to where tonight on my boobs.
