4:23 p.m. - Sep 9, 2001
Stolen kisses
I am following my heart. I am listening to myself. I am taking a chance. I am having a great time.
Friday night turned out better than I ever could've expected. It was Rita's day to clean which always means one thing - get out of the house. The original plans were for me to meet Walter after work, and head to the movies and dinner. I'm so glad that those plans fell through.
Lorah emailed me and wanted to get together. I had already made a commitment to Walter, to spend the evening with him. Wanted to get together with Lorah in the early evening, directly from work. She ended up having to work and wouldn't be free until around 8pm or so. I had to be home by that time, in order to fulfill my obligation to Walter, so it didn't look like I was going to be able to see Lorah. Bummer. I called Walter at work, but he had already left. I called him at home, but he wasn't there. Walter had originally wanted to meet me at Herman's, but that they (Herman & Natalie) had plans to go to the museum. I took a chance and called Herman's anyway, just to see if thay had heard from Walter. I guess they decided to change their plans because Natalie said that Walt was on his way to pick up beer & cigarettes, before coming over. Well, groovy. I left work and went to Herman's place. I love hanging out with Natalie - she is sweet & honest and has a gentle heart. Usually, when the four of us are together, we do the boy vs. girl thing...Natalie & I hang out, separate from Walter and Herman. They do "boy stuff" and we do "girl stuff."
We all decided to fire up the grill and have a little feast. We didn't have enough food for everyone, so we split up into two groups. Walter & Herman went to get more food. Natalie & I went back to her place, to pick up some other supplies. She has such an adorable little garage aprtment - what a diamond in the rough! Instead of rushing back to Herman's, we sat out on the balcony, drinking beer & smoking cigarettes. We talked about the problems we were having with "our" respective men. We talked about alot of things and just enjoyed the time away from the boys.
Eventually, the boys called, to find out what we were doing and when we would be back. So, we went back over to Herman's.
Just as we walked in the door, walter said, "Michelle, Lorah's on her way over here."
I looked at him, very puzzled, eyes gleaming. "What!? Lorah is coming here? What!?" The phone rang. It was Lorah. She was outside. I threw my purse down on the table and ran out the door, to meet her. I could barely contain myself. I hadn't seen or really spoken to Lorah in awhile - and so much has happened! I was so thrilled (and surprised) that she was there. I ran towards her and threw my arms around her, in a big warm hug. We just stood there, holding each other. I just kept telling her how thrilled I was that she was there. Wow!
We hung out and chatted - catching up on all that has happened since last we spoke. And wow - so much has gone on, in both of our lives. There were some stolen glances, some sneaky flirting, and lots of sexual tension between us. I wanted to kiss her. All night, all I could think about was...kissing her. When I gave her a tour of Herman's place, we found ourselves in a dark, empty place - alone. Twice. First, outside in the shop...and we just hugged each other tight and smiled. Then, in the front room that Herman uses as a sort of showcase for some of his work. I walked around the big metal bed that Herman made, to turn on the light. Lorah was right behind me. There was a big part of me that didn't want to turn the light on. There was a big part of me that wanted to just pull her close to me and kiss her...right then and there.
But, I resisted.
She had to be home by eleven. At 10:45, I walked her to her car. Unfortunately, she was parked in a VERY well lit lot, off of a busy street, right out in the open. I felt my heart beating hard and fast in my chest. I knew why my heart was beating so fast & hard - because all I wanted to do was kiss her. I told her how I wanted to kiss her, but "all these damn lights."
She smiled at me and didnn't really say anything. We hugged. She turned her face in to my neck. I could feel her lips up against my skin. I could feel her breath on my neck. Her mouth was only inches awy from mine. I wanted to turn my head and kiss her. I was so afraid that someone was going to walk out and catch us. I was so afraid that Walter or Herman or Natalie would walk out any second. I kissed her, but only very soflty and I somehow found the strength to keep my tongue in my mouth. We kissed again and I found myself nibbling on her bottom lip. Her mouth was so soft and sweet. I wanted to take her into a dark corner and kiss her the way that I really wanted to kiss her. But, I behaved myself. We did hold each other and we did kiss eqch other. But, I wanted more. I asked her if I could see her again on Sunday (today) and she smiled and said, "Maybe." She loves to play love games. Lorah, I know you read this. I would love to make out with you. I would love to kiss you and nibble on parts of your body, and get naked with you...etc., etc., etc.
Today, however, was not a good day for kissing girls. So much going on inside of me. Trying to take care of what I need to take care of. Preparing for tomorrow. Tomoroow is going to be a "doozie."
