5:55 p.m. - Feb. 25, 2002
Angel Kisses
I had freakish dreams after falling asleep sometime around 4AM on Sunday morning. When I got up around noon, strange memories of the dreams from the �night� before continued to swim around in my head. I woke up in a FUNK, an internal, not-quite-explainable funk, and it showed on my face and body. The image that peered back at me in the mirror was one of exhaustion and confusion. My brain must�ve had a lot to process; my dreams were a horrific kaleidoscope of fear and insecurities, with a dash of unresolved, work-related stress mixed in for good measure.
Unable to shake this nagging feeling of imbalance, unable to remember all of what I dreamt, (hoping that by remembering, I could put it to rest), I was in quite a mood when Adam called. I rambled madness to him about portions of those dreams � dreams that I can barely remember now. I was still half asleep. He listened. I don�t know what else was said, by either of us.
I brushed my teeth, threw on some clothes, and called Philly. Philly says yes when most people say no � just like my sweet love, Adam. I love that about the both of them. Although I was in a cruddy mood, Philly agreed to brunch together at one of my favorite little places - Kaldi caf�. We sat outside in the scrumptiously delicious weather and, after food; I began to come alive � slowly. The rest of the day I felt agitated, impatient, and stressed.
Flash to the evening. I had had several little conversations with Adam throughout the day and into the evening. We said our goodnights for the evening. And then I lay there, unable to sleep, tossing & turning, listening to the unstoppable chatter in my mind. Four hundred million thoughts ran at gale force through the chambers of my mind. I was a prisoner trapped inside the cage of my brain, helpless, unable to escape the unforgiving torture of a mind that won�t turn off.
Then the phone rang. Jeez, it was almost 1AM and my phone was ringing. I grabbed it on the first ring; an easy task, seeing as the phone was only inches away from my head. Emergency, emergency I�m thinking as I whispered my hello into the receiver. It was Adam, in a soft, haunted voice. (It was almost 2AM from where he was calling). My first words to him were, �Are you alright?�
�I have something to tell you,� he responded, in a faraway voice. I asked him to speak up.
�I have something to tell you.�
�Okay,� I muttered, apprehensively.
�Your mother sees you. You are not invisible. Your mother sees you. But, your light is so very bright. Sometimes there will be people that will be afraid to look at you, afraid of that bright light, afraid that it is so bright it will blind them.�
Well, holy shit. These were the words of an oracle. Angel words sent to me by way of my sensitive, loving messenger. I asked him if he had just had a vision. He whispered in the affirmative. He sounded dreamy. We wished each other a good night. I rolled over and drifted, finally, off to sleep.
I awoke this morning, rested, recharged, and at peace.
