2:31 p.m. - Oct. 03, 2002
End of the weekend
On Sunday, Eltin seemed to be back to his old self. Smiles and hugs and touches for me. Sweet, comforting relief.
I rode into town on the back of his bike. We all had breakfast together. It was yet another hot, sunny, humid day. Go back to the festival? Head home? Decisions, decisions...
Philip's brain-child was that we rent a small boat on the lake for an hour or so. I love the water. I love boats. I love to go fast and feel the spray of the water on my face. Yes, I was in!
Brian decided to ride back to Houston with Blake & Sasha, as they were done for the weekend and ready to be home again. Eltin, Lisa, Alex, Philip and I decided to rent the boat.
The last I saw of Brian was when I was hopping on the back of Eltin's bike. He was in the backseat of Sasha's car. We made eye contact. I blew him a kiss and he smiled and waved, as the car drove off.
Wow.
I rode back to Houston with Philip. I slept the majority of the way - conpletely exhausted and not much company. I hauled a bit of Eltin's things home for him. When I got home, I called him. He wanted to see me so I drove to his place.
Although we were both delirious with exhaustion, we still made incredible love together. I stayed the night and we made love again thefollowing morning. We were both late for work.
So - that was Monday morning. I haven't seen him since.
Monday, after work, all I wanted to do was hang with Sasha. Went directly from work to his place. We took Valium, we smoked, we talked about the weekend - and Eltin and Brian.
I got home around 9PM Monday night. I called Eltin (as I am always the one that makes contact). He said that he had been on the phone...and that he had just drawn a bath...and that he wanted to do some reading...and that he was going to do some letter writing.
Sounded to me like his OTHER is very much in the picture again. This is the first time that I've actually everfelt threatened by her presence in his life.
Ok.
But then he said, "I think I deserve an evening alone in my bed."
DESERVE!? As if it is a chore to share your bed with me? I was feeling weirdness again - and I was trying to figure out if I was just being too sensitive. ??? No telling. He was pushing back so I was stepping back. But, before we got off the phone, he said that he got my e-mail, "About tomorrow night..." (Multiple DJs at the Social, for a special Miguel Migs feature). Said that he MIGHT be interested - and that he MIGHT give me a call.
You MIGHT be interested - and you MIGHT give me a call?
Yes.
Well, ok.
Hung up the phone and decided right then and there that I was not going to be calling him. I was not going to be chasing him. If he doesn't want to be with me...
(what's a girl to do?)
